DH has been gone all day, and tonight will be with friends. I was out, but knew coming home that it’d be an empty house to greet me. Immediately I had impulses- shopping, movies, food. I realized I was looking for distractions. I gave in to window shopping, and got 2 rental DVDs to bring home. Then my mind said “Hey, how about Taco Bell? You could have a bean and cheese burrito right? You got cash?” I checked. Yes I did.
Something reminded me tho- if hungry isn’t the question, then food isn’t the answer. Was I hungry? No. So what was I really feeling? Sitting with uncomfortableness (is that a word?) is new. But I need to b able to do it.
My emotions were- sadness, resentment, sadness.
I’m thinking I should start keeping a gym bag and clothes in the car, so I can go work this out whenever it happens.
I went home tho – and DIDN’T go to Taco Bell.